Rollercoaster

As a woman, I've dealt with a lot of different roller coasters. Emotional, hormonal, mental, and physical. Lately, I've felt good, even great about life. I am happy about almost everything. My family is happy and in good health. I have great friends, and even better best friends. I love how involved I get to be with things I feel passionate about. But there is one thing that keeps me on that roller coaster. Jobs.

One day I want to be able to start a youth center. There is a lot more to it. But that isn't what I'm trying to get at right now. As I patiently await for God's OK to start one, I either stay at home with my babies. Or I get a job. When I worked for Curves, I loved it. I had a complaint every once in awhile. But I didn't dread going to work every single time. Or days in advanced. This job I do. It isn't a bad job. There aren't any bad people, so far, at work. It is the one thing that brings me down the big hill. And I'm not liking the ride down.

It bugs me how much it bums me out. And I can't put to words the reasons why me and this job just don't fit. I don't understand it, so how can I put words to it. I like the things I'm selling. I like the people I work with. I just don't like working the job. Right now this is the one roller coaster I don't want to be on, and I don't know how to get off. What if I go find another job and the same thing happens??? Because I have no justification as to why it is happening.